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Sunday, 20 December 2009
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2009 Recap- The 2nd Half
Halftime's over... let's get into the not-so-great part of 2009...
July came around, upon returning, it was clear that C and I went our separate ways. It left a huge void in my life, I was bitter and angry (even after a couple of months in), I decided to use that negative into motivation... looking for a job to get me out of the house any and every way necessary. I knew it was the only way I could get going again.
August rolled around... still no job, filed for unemployment (which is another story on its own)... was finally able to talk about my situation to a friend of mine, who was experiencing the same thing. I am thankful for her, because she was there, and I knew that the people I usually confided in were tired of me talking about it. They never said anything, but you got that vibe anyway. Started talking to a few girls... One I was really into, but all she wanted was sex. I'm all for it, but I wanted a little bit more. Needless to say, that fizzled out quick.
September... still not working, still no unemployment money, and my ESPN money was running out.. Took a break from trying to get back on the dating scene... B/c I was still trying to follow my heart. That was the time I realized that following my heart and trying to go after someone who has clearly moved on from you would lead to more heartbreak, and a non-existent relationship of any kind. I was trying to hold my promise that we would be best friends no matter what. After reading her blog pretty much saying that I wasn't her best friend anymore, I was crushed, but I had to keep moving forward, and really try to become the best D I could be. Met up with this lady here, and had a great time in Columbia with her, with a concert. I enjoyed the performance and her company.
October was a great month and a disappointing month at the same time. I got to get up for Greensboro to see a one-man poetry performance. I enjoyed her company, and seeing this lady as well. Got to see my good friend I haven't seen in years, but it got chilly that night, and I had no jacket, and I spent the week of my birthday crippled w/ a sinus infection. I did get better on my birthday, and went to Winston-Salem to celebrate with my friends. The sad news was that my uncle, who I was really close to, passed away (on my grandfather's birthday, the day before mine) and then a bigger loss was when our dog, our beloved Ginger, passed away the day after her 8th birthday. With those two gone, I cried... I use to cry so much as a kid, that most of the time when I'm really sad, I just don't cry anymore... it's more of anger. I get filled w/ rage. I had the rage more than tears w/ the breakup. The tears were true tears of sadness. Then it was Homecoming, and C & I hung out w/ our friends for the first time since we broke up. The way we interacted, was like nothing ever happened between us. For the day, for that moment, it was great... I felt complete... but reality came back to me the next day.
November.. reconnected with my old friend, Kie'rra (the one I made the last PSA on in 2006). When I reconciled with her last year, I really felt I matured so much, because I was hurt, and harboring such a grudge, but while I was doing that, she was living her life. Dealing w/ that situation has helped me realize that I need to keep an open mind about the break up. I can let the anger get past. I have forgiven C for her wrongs. Do I think about it? I do. There are times where I even blamed myself for going to CT, and coming up so empty. But I get over the bad. I know I can look back on it, and I saw five great years of ups and downs, but I would never regret getting with her. She helped me be a better person. I hope I have done the same for her as well. I have learned that whatever happens in the end, happens. November was also the time, where my friend Jessica & I had a HUGE war of words on Twitter. When I read the blog she wrote, I was hurt. I was pretty much portrayed as a bully on the internet, and I get my kicks off other people's misery, and since that's not the person I am, I was considered fake. I never have been called fake in my life to be honest, so yes... it did hurt when she said that, and it did hurt b/c the thing that I did say to set her off, I really did not mean any harm by it. But I do apologize again, if it was taken the wrong way, and I do apologize for escalating things. I have no animosity or beef w/ her. I have had trouble with this before, so it is a thing I have to work on, just picking and choosing the right time to be funny and the time to be serious. I'm not perfect, and I don't try to be. I just want to be the best D I can be. Oh yeah, still no work. LOL
December: Finally got a job at the post office this past week, and although it wiped out any holiday plans I had. Have had no contact w/ C in a long time, she's doing her thing, I'm doing mine, and I'm finally embracing the single life w/ open arms. I don't have to spend on getting diamonds, I don't have to go out to eat w/ someone right now, I have no obligations, and no drama. I'm 25 years old. I'm back in the working game for the time being. Hopefully after the holiday I'll still be around to be employed, as this gig is holiday and temporary. I've officially paid off my credit card, and I'm interacting and enjoying life again. So not a bad end to 2009, and I'm going to take that positive momentum into 2010.
So... as usual... when things look bleak, and I want to quit... I get an extra boost to fight harder! I did not let my eviction of 2007 beat me, and I did not let this breakup of 2009 beat me. I lived a dream, saw darkness, and I came back to the light. I will go on the record of saying that if there was a chance to work things out, I would consider it strongly. There will always be a place in my heart for C, but I gotta be the best D I can be before I give my heart to anyone or back to her.
The Show will be back in 2010. Hopefully back to the format that was a hit during the summer of 2008. "In My World", S&E, and the Late Night and Morning Blog Series.
I'm out, holler later!
D
Saturday, 19 December 2009
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2009 Recap- The 1st Half
Wow... what a year 2009 was. So much happened, all the celebrities passing, including Michael Jackson. It has been so surreal. The things and people that we take for granted can be taken away so quickly. As much as I say I want 2009 to be over, I look back on it as not the WHOLE year of 2009 was bad. It was the second half of it, that just made me want to just be ready for 2010.
I have to say, opening up 2009 was great, I did get to be in Connecticut with my co-workers at ESPN, but I was wishing that I was at home with my best friends and girlfriend. I was glad that they came by to see her and I know she was lonely without me. I was getting into the groove of being a PA at ESPN in the PA training program, just trying to leave an impression and make a statement.
In February, I began to learn the teleprompting aspect of my job by being the teleprompter for SportsCenter. Not only was I teleprompting any SportsCenter, I was teleprompting for the 11pm show, which is the most watched of all of them. I did awful at first. So awful it got to the point where I was demoralized, I was so mad that -3 degree weather felt really good, and I had a nervous breakdown. It was serious. I did improve though as the month went on, and stuck with it. I did suffer my first concussion by taking an elbow to the side of my head. I have felt lingering effects from it for the past few months.
In March, I was really missing C, and I wanted her to come to Connecticut and see me for our anniversary weekend. Things just did not work out in our favor, and I was really disappointed. I had a lot of good people to hang around, but being in CT and your mate is away is just draining. Having no car helped, and those that know me know I hate asking to be chaufferred everywhere. I was lonely, I was at times miserable. Everything I loved dearly was in Charlotte. But I knew this was a dream, a golden opportunity. I had to continue to seize the moment. Missing our five year anniversary was just devastating.
April rolled around, and my four-month review was up. I had a decent highlight reel, and there were things that needed work. Since I spent most of February and March w/ SportsCenter, I didn't get that many days to work on the highlights. I was surviving, but I was still very lonely. Things began going downhill as my original mentor, my Coordinating Producer (CP for short) got laid off. I was upset, and really felt abandoned. I really began unraveling, and I needed the support of my best friend, my girl, the one who would keep me positive and focus. I knew I was coming home to her, and she could get me straight. Little did I know that this was the beginning of a storm...
I finally came home in May. I loved being in Bristol (well, loved being at ESPN), but damn it was SO GREAT to be home. My family was happy to see me, my nephews and niece, and when I saw C, she was as beautiful as can be. I was proud of her because she started grad school classes, and I kept encouraging her to go for it, because she has a great knack and passion for Public Health. I also told her during her times of loneliness to go out and mingle, and meet some new friends. I didn't think that she would make a new male friend at her job that was into her, and it REALLY didn't think to me that she would reciprocate those feelings. I noticed something was not right, and I felt it. In an instant, she became distant, and it was like her heart was not in the right place. In about a five week span, five years of her feelings for me and her love for me instantly vanished. I felt betrayed, and I really began regretting going to ESPN at the time.
June came around, and my Prod Group (the group that voted on if I stay at ESPN or go home) leader, became my CP. I was very appreciative for him stepping in, but I had so little time, because it was time for my vote. I was already reeling from everything going on personally, and as much as I tried to block it out when I was at work, the spirit in me kind of died. I was scatterbrained, I was all over the map, and it was so tough, putting on a brave face, and a smile, when inside you're torn to shreds. Needless to say, I did not get kept, and when I needed to talk to C, she just really did not give me a lot of support. It was bad enough I lost her as my girl, but clearly I was losing her as a best friend too. After talking to her mom before I went home, I came to the realization that I had to let her go. I really did love her (and still do) so I had to do what was right for me, and for her. I hate the fact that a beautiful relationship like we had was just killed in a six month period. Sure we argued, and disagreed, but we always found a way to work it out. Guess this time, the best way to work it out was to go separate ways. Not only was my relationship gone, my dream died, and I was back in the same spot I was in 2008: my parents' house. I also broke a promise to myself that I said once I left for CT, I was not coming back. (sigh)
Aight, it's halftime. Be back for round 2.
D
Tuesday, 24 November 2009
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Update On Life/Clearing My Name
Xanga Nation... what it do? what the business is? LOL okay, enough w/ that...
It's been a while... so I figure I'd drop in and update y'all on the happenings of my world.
The job front is still the same... still not working out in my favor, but I'm doing alright. I had gotten discouraged at one point, and with the encouragement of my parents, I have definitely got the confidence back. I'm following leads, and making adjustments.
Love life... non-existant... and I plan to keep it that way for a while... I'll be honest... although I'm moving forward, the heart hasn't moved forward, but it's at the point where I can not listen or follow my heart. All it will do is lead to more heartbreak, so I gotta do what I gotta do to let that shit heal. Sucks when your heart found a place and it's either rejected, broken, or turned away.
Still healing from the two deaths in the family. It's still so strange to not have Ginger in the house with us. I really do miss her a lot. I miss my uncle a lot... he'd be so happy to know that the Chiefs are on a winning streak. He was a huge KC fan. I did however, get to talk to my grandfather the other day, and for 94 years old, he sounded great.
Not too much excitement to report though... wish I had better things to say.
But I do have some drama...
Apparently I have ruffled a lot of feathers with people from Twitter... I want to go on the record of saying if anybody has been offended by the things that I've said on Twitter, on Xanga, on WP, or anywhere else, I sincerely apologize. I had a videoblog that I did on Saturday, but I could not get it uploaded. There has been so much that has been said about me, that I am fake, that I am an internet bully, or a psycho little boy. I can take the psycho part, b/c sometimes I do have a head with no screws in it, but for me to be fake or some e-bully that comes around whipping people w/ a spacebar is simply preposterous.
Words are weapons. They hurt. I have said a lot of things on Twitter that are oh, say... controversial. I didn't think they hurt people, because I thought we were cool enough to joke around with. I always thought that I could have fun with a person and know there's a time and place for everything. I am a genuine person, and the person on Twitter is the same person you would see on the streets, the same person on AIM, Facebook, or whatever. I have had so far two people, and possibly there are more people (according to one of them) that I have hurt or allegedly hurt. from my comments on Twitter. I even had a whole blog dedicated to me, basically slamming me and my character. You can read that blog here:
Intense stuff, right? I did not think (and I do not think it was serious), but apparently to Jessica, it was serious. So I will go on the record of publicly apologizing to her, and to anyone else that has taken the things that I have said the wrong way. I never meant to hurt anybody. I am not a saint (I never have acted like it), and I am not perfect. I am a human being like everyone else, and I am not God. I was just making a general statement, and I really did not feel like it was serious. As with my other "confrontations", I did not feel like I was doing anything wrong, so until I got the reaction I received, it was a shock. I did not want anyone to feel like I had an agenda by saying "How am I gonna ruin (insert name here)'s life today?" or "(Insert name here) is feeling bad... how can I make them feel worse?" Come on people! If you have read the blogs, talked to me on AIM, you know I'm a clown, and I'm serious when I need to be. I just really feel there has been a lot of misunderstandings and misconceptions about me, and the kind of person I am. I'm not doing this for attention, nor am I doing this to get people on my side and make people choose sides, I'm doing this for me. This is to clear my name and clear my conscience. I apologize to anyone that has ever taken anything I said the wrong way, and I hope my apology is accepted. To Jessica, I apologize for hurting your feelings, and I apologize for escalating the situation. I do see where you would be upset, but I did not mean any kind of malicious intent to the point where it got to, and I hope my apology is accepted.
This will also be a "simulcast" on the WP blog. Have a great day, Xanga Nation, and if I am not back, Happy Thanksgiving.
D
Saturday, 31 October 2009
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Showing My Presence
What up Xanga Nation, I've decided to show my ugly head in here. I don't want to say I'm back on a regular basis, b/c when I do say that, I disappear. I'm just here just to be here, so here's what's been happening in my world.
- The past two weeks have been a very rough time for myself and my family... The week of my birthday, I got slammed with a sinus infection. Of course the first thing everyone thinks of when you are sick is that damn H1N1, but my body never ached, I did not vomit. My sinuses straight mollywhopped me all over the place. Even got stuck with a case of pinkeye. So for the whole week my parents were out of town, I was bed-ridden. My sister did a great job though taking care of me and making sure I was okay by checking up on me. The day before my birthday, on my grandfather's birthday, my uncle passed away after a year and a half battle with cancer. That was tough, considering that my grandmother passed away on my cousin's (my uncle that passed daughter) birthday. So my parents stayed an extra day with my aunt to keep her company.
- The next week, my dog, who has been sick since mid-April due to her own battle with cancer, flatlined on Sunday, but the vets revived her. She was breathing very hard, and my parents and I left to go to Kansas City (this was my parents second trip in two weeks to the Midwest) for my uncle's funeral. Ginger was in bad shape. We were hoping that she would make it through the weekend, and my parents were going to put her to sleep. While in Missouri, my sister found her dead. I was saddened by the news, but what really broke me was on top of thinking about my uncle, who I was close with, after my sister called 311, they wanted her to call solid waste and leave her on the curb like a piece of garbage. I broke down and cried after that b/c she was more than that. My parents did not want her to be tossed like that, so they had her cremated instead. I'm at peace with both passings, as I talked to my uncle before he went, and we saw Ginger make it to eight years old, and then the day after she passed. Seeing my cousins though really softened the pain, just wish I could see them under different circumstances
- Job hunt. I'm just losing all hope in that department... I can't get a break to save my life. I'm going to keep applying and hoping for the best. I do need the money to pay for school for this second bachelor's degree. Once I get a job, I will be okay. Being home is not bad, it's just worst when you're not contributing like you should. I don't like mooching off people, especially my parents and all they've done for me...
- Love life is non-existent... and it will stay that way. I have simmered things down w/ C feelings why, I don't harbor bitterness, I'm not over what happened, but I forgive. Will I forget? Hell nah... but it happened. and I can't dwell on that. I just don't need anyone at this present moment in time. I have to keep pressing and doing me, and safeguarding my heart.
Well... it is homecoming, and I'm about to roll out. Be easy Xanga Nation... til next time.
D
Thursday, 01 October 2009
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Late Night Blog XXXVII- Realizing
**This was a Late Night Blog that I thought I posted early this morning, but it turns out that I never did... so sit back and enjoy, this will also be on the WP blog... Enjoy!
This is the first LNB in over three months...I have to say though, I have been on a journey in the five months since I came back from va-cay. So much has changed, and I have always stood by this motto in life: Adversity Builds Character. The adversity I suffered from 2007 and the eviction deal has really been so tremendous in helping me deal with the drama in 2009. Although 2009 started out great, living the dream, it came crashing down with the end of my relationship... as I try to do like Hustle Man and "Pick up the piiiiieeeeeeces" (Martin reference), I have learned a lot about myself through this...
- I realized that I handled the break up the best way I could, and I did it like a champion. I could've amped, I could've gotten so angry to the point I could have done something drastic. But I didn't. I had so much love for her that I could not be so mad. I stayed rational, I was willing to forgive. I do believe now that I was not mad for her cheating, but I was mad that she just quit on me. For what? Coming back home and living with my parents? Having to start over? Yeah, I haven't been real consistent with the job situation, and I can see that. Despite that, I did one hell of a job treating her, and she will not get that anywhere else. I do have love for her, and down the road I hope we can be close again, like we used to be. I know I have to be a better communicator, and more vocal, and stand my ground. I also need to learn to be more honest about situations, and stop trying to be perfect. Despite those flaws, I'm a damn good 80... and I will pray that things work out for the best, no matter the outcome
- I realized that I have no shame to be at home anymore. Look, this economy tanked, and it's slowly getting better, but we have a long way to go. There are SO many people that are in my shoes, and grant it, I think it's a good thing b/c when I DO start working, I have no bills but the ones I have to pay off. I am two payments away from paying off a credit card, I started paying a hospital bill, and I'm currently challenging one company on a bill. that I did not have. I am not a failure. I have done things in my near 25 years that most people can wish they said they could do. I've lived in Japan, I have traveled all over the US, I graduated college, I worked at ESPN, no matter what, I have backed up what I have said. So if me coming back home is labeling me a failure, you know what, you can suck it for all I care, b/c I have had a successful run.
- I realize that I do love myself, I am good enough, and I am blessed to have two great parents, two great sisters, two nephews, a niece, plenty of family and friends that support me. The support I have received from everyone throughout the bad times has really showed me who is there and who isn't there. I know I'm not in the best situation but hey, I have a roof over my head, surrounded by love, and damn it, I'm a single man... I know I'm going to be the complete package once I'm stable again. I excited at the possibilities that are coming my way.
So after all of this, I'm glad things are looking up, and throughout the adverse times of 2007, it made me into a stronger person. The adversity I've gone through in 2009 can mean even better things for 2010...
I'm out.. holler
D
Thursday, 24 September 2009
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The Purge
A lot has happened in the past couple of weeks.... The stress level is at an all-time high, and I'm on the verge of losing it. I'm going to go ahead and purge my soul right now...
- The job situation has not improved at all. Nobody seems to be biting on the resume', especially with the ESPN experience on there. I know the times are hard, but I see things are looking up. I don't know what is in store for me and what plans are in mind, but I'm just tired of sitting in this house.
- I'm going to be 25 in almost three weeks... and I'm in my parents' house. I know, I'm not the only one, but why am I here, and what did I do to deserve this? I regret getting that credit card, but at least that is getting paid off (two more months and it's over with). I am really trying to get my life together, I have to be more responsible with my spending though. I just want to do better.
- The strain w/ my dad and I is at its worse... After a huge blowup a couple of days ago, he has not spoken to me since then... it sucks, b/c even though we aren't on the same page, we always maintained a great relationship, and it's at its worse now. I hope it can be repaired. I know it will be, but it's been a rough 36+ hrs though, eight words spoken in the past few days is just insane
Just those things and what not are the three main issues... the last one is really one that needs to be water under the bridge, but I feel like I had to purge myself, so I can focus on TSX, Google Adsense, and making money off this blog and giving this site the best content I can bring. I just hope it will pass. It has to pretty soon, or I'ma snap.
That's all... holler later.
D
Tuesday, 15 September 2009
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International Trucks Maxxforce TV Widget
I just posted this Maxxforce TV widget for 500 credits. You can earn free credits too!
Friday, 11 September 2009
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Life Update
I guess I can break you guys off with a life update....
- Job search: still nothing... nobody is biting on what I'm offering and bringing to the table... it's a difficult process to deal with, as this is the longest I have been without being at work since I started working...But I'm still dealing with it one thing at a time. I have to stay optimistic, even though it is highly discouraging. I still am hopeful that things will turn out okay.
- Family: love being around them, but I do not like being almost 25 and at home. Yeah I know that there are a lot of people more in this situation like me, but I don't like it one bit. I brought a lot of this on myself, with the irresponsibility financially and reckless spending. I am very grateful that I am here in this house, and I could be elsewhere... just an independent thing. I could be doing a lot better, but I am here, so I gotta deal with it
- Love/Relationships: well... C and I are officially not speaking... been like this for the past week and a half... I just decided that I can't be her friend right now, if not ever. In my eyes, she has no remorse for what she did, and she doesn't care. Whoever she has become is not the woman I fell in love with... So the best thing for her and I to do is go separate ways and not even look back. I never asked for it, she wanted it this way. I wish her the best. I'm through with the situation, and I'm through with her.
But they say as one door closes, another one opens... who knows where this may go... I won't speak on it too much right now...
- TSX: TSX is doing well... I have made strides, but I just want to keep that momentum going. The traffic is coming and going, and I have even began making posts to a up-and-coming blog site, Most Valuable Network, or MVN. So far, thanks to TSX, I have made three posts, and I'm going to make many more.
So that's the latest and greatest... Hope all is well with you, Xanga Nation.. be back soon!
D
Friday, 28 August 2009
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Bad Mood
They say when you aren't happy about a situation, then do something about it....
Even when you put up every single maximum effort to do it, you fall short...
I've been wondering what did I do to be back in this house? I am glad to be around my family, but this was not in my vision or my plan. I was planning to have my own place (or be living w/ my ex), getting ready to propose to my ex, and have a steady job at ESPNU...
If you haven't been following, let's look at a quick recap:
- ESPN Training Program did not work out
- Back in this house
- C and I ended things
- No job
Now do these things sound like that was in ANY of the plan? NO!
I've been calm about it, but my patience is wearing thin... I'm trying to keep my composure, but it's definitely hard to do... I'm doing the best that I can... Keeping your head above water is not the easiest thing to do...
I'm not looking for sympathy, and I don't need hear the "pray on it" and "keep God first" spill... I just need to get these thoughts out... Matter of fact, I'm disabling comments... look for me on the other blog... holler later...
D
Monday, 24 August 2009
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The Final Countdown: Decision Time
this would be the best time to play that song... it's like the best song to play when you have a huge decision to make...
So... I've been contemplating grad school. Clearly I said I was going to have my Masters by the time I'm 25. That's not happening, so I've extended it to 30. I made it into the field (working for ESPN) so that's a good substitute. Since I've been home and not doing anything, the idea of grad school has really came into play. I know I'm on my own on this one, and I'm ready to be on my own. As the days go by, the outlook for grad school is not only promising, but the desire to get it done is building.
With that said, as I always say: If I decide I'm going to do something, it will get done. I said I'd bounce back from my eviction, I did. I said that I would graduate undergrad, I did. I said that I was going to go to ESPN, and I did. I said that I'm going to get a teaching license, I will. So now, add grad school to this list. It's the perfect time, and I want a new challenge in life. New city, new school, new friends, the works.
After doing research on schools, there was really two originally: Georgia State and S. Carolina, but for a while, a dark horse has been creeping up, and has actually taken over as the front runner: Norfolk State. In fact, looking at it now, the schools have been down to two: Norfolk State University and Georgia State University.
A little backstory here: Computer Science at A&T messed me up royally. It literally killed my GPA, and I did well in my Journalism classes. The GPA was a 2.49, but it does not reflect me as an individual. I hate this fact but it is what it is. This could affect me majorly with grad school, simply b/c on paper, it looks terrible. I would have to do EXTREMELY well on the GRE to counter my GPA. I do know I can get recommendations from plenty of people. (some in VERY high places)
Norfolk State University
Location: Norfolk, VA
Sports Teams: Norfolk Tides (AAA-baseball), Norfolk Admirals (AHL)
Distance From Charlotte: 5 hrs
Pros: Norfolk State has a masters in media and communications, and has something that I'm looking for specifically: Broadcast Administration (managing at a station or newsroom) and Media Production. The program would be something right up my alley and I would definitely be up for it. There's no GRE requirement, and I would be on a provision status if I was to go. If I prove myself, I can definitely be in the program, and get my degree in a year or two. If this guy does go through with going to Norfolk State, we'd be reunited for the first time since the MasterMind days.
Cons: It's a HBCU, and I am an alum of one, and I love the environment and being around my people, but I've been in this atmosphere since HIGH SCHOOL. It kind of takes away from the desire to change my environment, but I'll deal with it if I have to survive. Although everything works more in my favor going here, I feel like I'd be taking the easy way out. Sometimes you don't want that.
Georgia State University
Location: Atlanta, GA
Sports Teams: Atlanta Braves (MLB), Atlanta Falcons (NFL), Atlanta Hawks (NBA), and Atlanta Thrashers (NHL) (note: I am not a fan of these teams except for the Thrashers)
Distance From Charlotte: 3.5 hrs
Pros: Georgia State has a Film/Video/Digital Emphasis, which is perfect with the new media wave of journalism. I do have a vested interest in that personally. It is not that far from home, just a trip up I-85 North to Charlotte. The program, like Norfolk's, is accredited. I would be challenged a lot more, and I like a challenge. It is perfect since I have a desire to move to Atlanta, not an HBCU, but still has urban flair to it.
Cons: Atlanta has SO much to do, so it would be a distraction to get anything done with so much going on. The standards for GA State are high. I'm afraid if they look at my transcript, they'll say no on the spot. I would definitely have to score HIGH on the GRE. I think I could work my way around it if I got some pretty good letters of recommendations from my people at ESPN. It seems like a long uphill battle to get in, but I believe I have a shot. After all, the worse they can say is no, right?
So.. I'm going to handle my business. get this GRE taken, and see where it goes from there. We shall see.
I'm out for the day. Holler later, Xanga Nation
D
TrueAbout Me
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just me... what more can i say?
Pulse
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i'll never get a break... the days go by, the more frustrating it is... I just can't take this anymore...
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for every action, there's an equal and opposite reaction, not a rule of physics, but a rule of life... remember that
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well... had to free myself from her control, told her I need time to myself... feelings are still bitter and I need FULL healing
